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Morning Star

It has been an incredibly difficult and stressful time since my last blog. I feel I would like to share the abridged story at this time. My dad’s Alzheimer’s dementia continued to progress and my dad’s physical and mental condition declined. He became more unstable on his feet. My family and I did our best to keep him safe and provide the tools he needed, but a fall was inevitable. He fell one evening at home onto the hard wood floor. We thought at first he had just hurt his arm. But later, he tried to stand and was unable to bear any weight on one leg. I knew that a hospital visit would not be a good experience, so I thought we would wait until morning to see if it felt better. It was another sleepless night as he struggled to get up to go to the bathroom. By the next morning, he had forgotten that he had fallen and wondered if other people had contracted the disease that made them unable to bear weight on one leg. My brother pretty much carried him out of the house to the car. The ER visit showed nothing broken, but as he was unstable and unsafe to go home, he was admitted to the hospital. That resulted in a 2-week stay including over medication and restraints to keep him from getting up by himself. My brother and I spent most of the daylight hours with him to try to keep him calm. My sister spent some time as well and my mom went as often as she could handle. Due to the medication and condition that my dad was in, we had a very difficult time finding a rehab facility that would accept him. Once we did, we were hopeful. My dad found a new freedom there with no restraints, but was terribly confused and fell into the closet the third day. He said he was going into the garage to find a new bed. Once again, my brother and I spent about 12 hours a day there to help my dad feel more calm. The physical therapy he received there stabilized him physically, however his confusion and dementia increased. We tried to find him a memory care facility near our home, but the 2 that we talked to declined as our time for discharge was upon us. It was an option for him to remain at his current skilled nursing facility who touted dementia programs. However, at one point they tried to move my dad to a different wing with a violent roommate. Luckily my sister had taken that shift and insisted that they bring him back where he was. The facility assured me that if my dad stayed with them, he would not be moved. The day after I wrote them a hefty check, I was told he would be moved to the other wing due to his unpredictable and agitated behavior. I toured the place and was terrified to put my dad in that environment. We also fully understood that at this point, we were no longer able to care for him and keep him and those around him safe. We decided that if my dad was going to have to move, it would be to a place we wanted him to be. When I asked, his charge nurse told me of a memory care facility in the foothills that she always had good experience with. I spoke to the people there and toured the facility. I cried when I saw the beautiful scenery, access to outside courtyards, and the private apartments that they offered as opposed to a hospital type room with a curtain separating 2 beds. My hope was only a thread line by this time and I held my breath as they went through the vetting process. The people communicated and were helpful and empathetic. When I found out he was accepted, I was afraid to get excited. We moved his furniture in today and will move him in tomorrow. We are praying for a good transition and peace for us all. The name of the place is Morning Star, based on Revelation 22:16 in which Jesus proclaims He is the morning star. The first line of their mission statement is “Honor God in our business practices and relationships”. I feel God has provided this place for us and that all we have gone through has been preparing us for this move. During these weeks, I have tried my best to cling to God who knows and loves us best. I have been most grateful for the prayers and timely notes from encouraging people. And yes, I did find God in several instances. I hope to share some of those over the next few days. Thank you, readers, for your prayers and your care.

I Found God today in people who care, encourage, and share prayers.

12 comments on “Morning Star

  1. Sorry to hear what you’re going through with you’re dad. Sending good thoughts your way 🙏🌞

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  2. Tammy, I knew as I was reading your blog that you had found Morningstar. That is where we placed my mom as well. She was at the Bear Creek location. Praying for you that this is a smooth transition and brings you comfort to have him there.

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  3. My heart goes out to you and your family, Tammy. I will be praying for you, your dad, and family to bring healing, comfort, strength, peace, faith, and love. Hang in there, my friend. “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. ‘”

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  4. You’re doing an amazing job caring for him & showing love & respect. God is watching over you. So glad you have found a good place you trust. My stepfather was at the Veteran’s home in Tilton in their dementia unit and, I have to say, they did a great job with him. It tore my heart out watching his decline. Praying for you. 🙏

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  5. Tammy, Our sister-in-law worked at Morning Star on the north side. She has only positive things to say about the facility. Your Dad is certainly in God’s hands there. We have been praying for him since we heard of his declining issues. Peace be with you and your family. Yours in the risen Christ, Larry and Margie

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  6. Tammy I just wanted to add to Margery comments that you are in my prayers both morning and night. I have read over a month of you blogs so far and I have found God in them. Have you tried making potato skin pie yet?

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