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Great Expectations

Posted by eph21920 on February 19, 2024 in Answer, Faith, Life, Marriage, Opportunity, Plan, Struggles, Trust

This afternoon I went to the funeral for my friend’s mother-in-law. It included a beautiful slideshow of her life. As the deacon reflected on her life, he mentioned the photograph of her and her husband’s wedding day. They were very much in love and ready to take on the world as they spoke their vows. Yet, they had no idea what they were committing to and could not have expected what the future held. But with faith, they managed every situation. I have heard it said that expectations are the thieves of joy. The daily reflections I have been listening to have mentioned the same thing. At some point, we can clearly know the path we should take. At the same time, we can carry expectations of how it is going to play out. When things don’t go as we expected, we can become resentful, angry, depressed. Once our enthusiasm is dashed with a reality different from what we thought was going to be, the temptation is to simply give up. It is necessary to stay close to God, look at the situation through His eyes, and trust that He has a purpose for everything.

I Found God today reminded to look at each day through God’s eyes.

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Power of Music

Posted by eph21920 on February 18, 2024 in Answer, Faith, Friends, Music, Sick

A friend from out of state was here with her family for her mother-in-law’s funeral. I was so happy that they met me for Mass this morning. The opening song was “Christ in Me Arise”, which is the one that was so meaningful to my other friend who I saw on Ash Wednesday. It brought tears to my eyes on her behalf. Later, they led the song, “On Eagle’s Wings”. That was at my dad’s funeral. My friend glanced at her husband. She said that it was the song he requested for his mom’s funeral which will be tomorrow. More tears. I was chatting with a friend tonight about the music and she said she can get lost in the words of a sermon, but never in a song. Music truly does have a power all it’s own.

I Found God today in the power of music.

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Love Until It Hurts

Posted by eph21920 on February 17, 2024 in Answer, Connected, Faith, Family, Friends, Grateful, Love, Struggles

This morning’s meditation on my favorite Hallow app was based on a quote by St. Mother Teresa, “Love until it hurts”. The title itself really touched my heart. The actual full quote that I discovered was, “I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.” The reflection was given by Sr. Mary Bernice who was a Missionary of Charity. She told the story about her mother’s sacrificial love. Her father had been in the Korean War. When the war ended, it took another 2 years to find him. When they brought him back, he went into the hospital as he was delirious. Her mother made the choice to bring him home and nursed him back to complete health over the next 40 years, with the help of necessary therapies. Sr. Bernice explained that in our current world, we are told that we should love if it feels good or makes us happy. But if there is any pain involved, it is not for us. Mother Teresa taught that instead, we need to love even when it hurts. To live real love, we must suffer through it. I felt that I completely understood, as caring for my parents – and now my mom – gets harder and more painful. It is painful to see her struggle. It is painful not to have the magic pill or solution to cure her. It is painful to watch her continued decline. To conclude, Sr. Bernice said a beautiful prayer that ended with, “I ask them that whatever pain and sorrow they are going through for the ones that they love, that they will see that You loved them first on the Cross, and that when we love, until it hurts, it is our way to salvation.” By that time I was weeping as silently as I could as I was in my mom’s room. The prayer went straight to my heart. I thanked God again for the ways He reminds me that He is here with us in this most difficult time. A little while later I received a text from a far away friend who said she had just listened to the same meditation and thought of me. I started crying again. She called and we were able to talk, catch up, and yes – cry some more. I was so blessed by her encouragement and prayers. It was a hard day for mom, but I kept remembering the words – Love Until It Hurts.

I Found God today in encouragement to keep on loving, even through the pain.

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Trying to Be Still

Posted by eph21920 on February 16, 2024 in Answer, Bible, Connected, Faith, Grateful, Home, Jesus, Struggles

I have been very weary lately and ready for a break. This morning my mom read from Jesus Calling. I felt Jesus speaking directly to me. The reflection said in part, “Thank Me for the conditions that are requiring you to be still. . . Instead of resenting the limitations of a weakened body, search for My way in the midst of these very circumstances. . . Although you feel cut off from the activity of the world, your quiet trust makes a powerful statement in spiritual realms.” Thank you Jesus.

I Found God today hearing His voice.

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Open Wide the Gates

Posted by eph21920 on February 15, 2024 in Answer, Bible, Faith, Jesus, Lent, Peace

I know it’s Lent, but today I listened to a meditation that focused on Jesus’ appearance to the disciples in the upper room after His Resurrection. According to the scripture, John 20:19-23  the doors were locked as the disciples were in fear for their lives. When Jesus came to them, the first thing He did was to offer them peace. It didn’t matter that most of them ran away, abandoned Him, and wouldn’t even sit at the foot of His cross with Him. He loved them, He knew their hearts, and He knew what they needed. The presenter quoted St. Pope John Paul II, “Do not be afraid.” and “Open wide the gates.” The listener was encouraged to think about their fears, unlock the doors, and open wide the gates to their hearts, allowing Jesus to bring His peace. It was a beautiful reflection and I was at peace during that time. If I could only figure out how to hold onto it all day…

I Found God today in His peace.

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Signs of Love

Posted by eph21920 on February 14, 2024 in Connected, Family, Friends, Generosity, Grateful, Lent, Life, Love

I started thinking about Valentine’s Day yesterday and picked up a bouquet of flowers for my mom and sister. Also at one point I looked out the window and saw some interesting clouds. To me, it looked like ❤️YA. It made me smile. This morning my mom and I opened super cute cards from my sister. My mom’s was a stand up musical card with a piano that played part of Claire de Lune. There was also a pull tab to make some hearts dance. My generous and loving brother sent us each a beautiful bouquet of flowers. While we were admiring them, my mom suddenly looked up and said, “There’s my Valentine!” She was looking at a metal heart ornament that read, “Love you to the moon and back”. It was the last Valentine’s gift that my dad had given her. We had hung it on the chandelier over the dining room table. The next time we walked through my mom’s room, she looked at my dad’s picture and said how much she loved it. Then she said we should give him some of the flowers. We found a little ceramic flower and vase statuette thaty mom loved and she placed it by his picture. We had 2 nurses come at the same time this morning and we all cried when I told them the stories. Since mom had decent energy and wanted to go to church on Ash Wednesday, off we went. We met a friend of mine there who also brought her mom in a wheelchair. It was beautiful to share the celebration with them. During the Mass, we sung the hymn, “Christ in Me Arise”, which is a particularly meaningful song for my friend. She had a good cry and we shared some good hugs. Later in the afternoon, my son’s girlfriend came over and gave my mom a nice massage. My mom loves it and I enjoy the time visiting with her. It was quite an emotional day all around and I felt blessed to experience it all.

I Found God today in many signs of Love.

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Hope and Inspiration

Posted by eph21920 on February 13, 2024 in Connected, Faith, Friends, Grateful, Hope, Life, Prayer, Struggles

Today I was thinking about a friend who I haven’t talked to in quite a while. As I was planning on touching base with her, I heard from her first. Her initial question was, “How can I pray for you this Lent?” I was so moved that she thought of me in this way and reached out. We went back and forth for quite some time as we have had many challenges in common. She shared some of the knowledge she has received during her trials. One statement she made was, “God in His Infinite wisdom gives us what we need when we need it most.” Her steadfast faith and perseverance is hopeful and inspiring to me. I was so grateful and blessed to hear from her today.

I Found God today hearing from a friend who was on my mind.

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Calm Dynamic

Posted by eph21920 on February 12, 2024 in Answer, Connected, Family, Grateful, New, Opportunity, Relationship, Struggles

Last week our regular caregiver was out, so we had new and different people. One of the girls was great with my mom; patient, low key, and knowledgeable. Mom was very comfortable with her. So I was pretty happy when I was able to hire her to come in a couple afternoons every week. It was especially fortunate since the last one that we hired was unable to continue. It is all such a rollercoaster ride. I feel almost numb sometimes. In any case, the new caregiver came over this afternoon. The dynamic between her and my mom was wonderful and calm. My mom has been getting pretty anxious in the afternoons, but the caregiver was able to keep her busy enough to keep it from escalating. And she did some laundry. And the dishes. I got on my computer and took care of some business that has been put aside. The new caregiver was a blessing for sure.

I Found God today in a calm new caregiver.

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Back to God

Posted by eph21920 on February 11, 2024 in Connected, Faith, Grateful, Healing, Life, Love, Past, Present, Struggles

The Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes always gives me pause to reflect and I welcome the opportunity. This morning I found the Lourdes Live station on YouTube and was immediately brought back there in my memory. As a child it was an overwhelming experience that I couldn’t have been prepared for and one that I remember as if it was yesterday. That spiritual encounter is how I know God exists and why I do my best to stay close to Him. I realize I fail and am so grateful for His forgiving mercy. Two years ago we buried my dad on this day. Truthfully I have been struggling ever since. But when I remember that this day is the Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes, I remember that God has been with us all along and still is. I know so many people who have experienced God’s love, yet have turned away. My prayer today is for myself, family and friends – especially those in need of healing – and all who need to find their way back to God.

I Found God today remembering His merciful love.

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PJ Day

Posted by eph21920 on February 10, 2024 in Answer, Family, Grateful, Home, Life, Weather

It was a snowy day today, no one was coming over, and we weren’t going anywhere. My sister and I started on a reorganizing project and tag-teamed mom as we worked on it. Before I knew it, it was 5:00 pm and I was still in my pajamas. Perhaps that’s why I was so comfortable. It did feel good, however, to take a shower and get half dressed. Then I was half ready for bed again. Even though mom had a challenging afternoon sundowning, it was a pretty relaxed day. And before bed mom was relaxed as well and thanked us for such a nice day.

I Found God today in a more relaxing day.

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