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Familiar Words

A few months ago, my mom’s friend’s son-in-law died. I had scheduled a Mass to be offered for his soul. It was today. I met our friend there and we prayed together. I recognized the Gospel reading:

Mt 11:28-30
Jesus said:
“Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.”

It was the same scripture that we had for my mom’s funeral only a little over a week ago. It made me smile as I thought of my mom finally getting the elusive rest that she so desired. I had my own sense of peace as I felt God’s loving presence through those familiar words. And it was so fitting to hear the same Gospel as we remembered our friend’s son-in-law.

I Found God today in His words of rest.

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Loving Friendships

Tonight I went to dinner with my friends who I worked with years ago. The group still meets at a restaurant once a month. Some people were at my mom’s funeral, but I had missed several months of the get togethers, so it was good to see everyone again. I was met with hugs, words of condolences, and thoughtful advice. I felt very blessed, supported, and loved. I am grateful for these truly special friendships.

I Found God today in loving friendships.

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Daughters In Law

I am grateful to have two amazing young women as part of the family. One is my older son’s wife of almost twenty-two years. The other is technically not yet a family member, but she will be marrying my younger son next year. The three of us had breakfast together this morning. During our conversations, I was reminded of how long I have known my daughter in law and how much she has been through in her life thus far. And I realized again what a loving, patient, and thoughtful person she is. My son and their children are certainly blessed. I have spent enough time with my son’s fiancé to know that she is sweet, considerate, and faithful. And I have much to learn about her. This morning we all enjoyed the conversation, the food, and each other’s company. I look forward to spending more time with them.

I Found God today in the blessing of daughters in law.

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The Funeral

I have taken a little break from writing, but not from praying and pondering. As I think about the events during the last few weeks, I am grateful to realize God’s hand and love through it all. When my father died, my mom chose everything for his funeral, from the visitation through to the burial details. Much later, I talked to my mom about how she would like things to be for her own funeral. She said that she wanted everything the same as my dad’s. The one thing of importance to her was that she would be buried with him at the National Cemetery. I double and triple checked with the cemetery to make sure she knew that would be arranged. Because we knew what she wanted for the most part, it made the planning phase a little easier. The hardest part was getting the church and the cemetery dates coordinated. Once that was done, we put the rest in place. Everyone in the family contributed. My nephew’s wife created a beautiful prayer card and program for the Mass with a lovely photo of my mom. In the program, we also included a photo of the prayer card with her name on it and one of our favorite photos of her praying hands. The cards and programs were on the memorial table in the church. Also on the table was a black and white photo of my mom at her beloved piano when she was very young, one of her and her best friend playing the piano together, one of my mom and dad on their wedding day and one of them together only a few years ago. The table was decorated with origami flowers that my nephew made from one of my my mom’s piano teaching books. The day started with a time of visitation in the church for people to pay their last respects. The front of the church was adorned with beautiful flowers around my mom’s casket. My mom looked peaceful as her hands held the rosary she received from her best friend and a handmade rosary in which the names of children and grandchildren were spelled out on the beads. At the same time, it was obvious that the essence of who my mom is, was gone. After a time of visitation, we prayed the rosary. I brought my mom’s rosary collection to share with others. Sadly, one of my sisters was recovering from a very bad illness and was unable to come. So, as Mass was about to begin, my brother set up a livestream video event for her and for others to watch. Then my son played and sang his most heartfelt version of Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” that I have ever heard from him and the tears started falling. My mom loved listening to him sing. My brother gave a reflection of my mom’s life highlighting the theme of Graceful, her faithful service to God as church musician during her entire life, and envisioning my mom playing that big pipe organ in the sky. A good friend of many years who is a priest came to preside. I felt so blessed by his presence and words of comfort. His homily included an explanation of all the Catholic “things we do” – placing the white cloth on the casket and sprinkling with holy water as a reminder of Baptism into God’s family, lighting the Easter candle reminding us of Jesus’ promise of resurrection, and using incense symbolizing the rising of our prayers to Heaven. My son and sister did a wonderful job proclaiming two of the scripture readings. My grandchildren carried the offertory gifts down the aisle to the priest. One of the songs was “The Lord Bless You and Keep You.” When my mom was in the high school choir, they would end each concert with this song. I thought of her with her choir now singing the song in an angelic way. More tears. At the end of Mass, my sons and grandsons were the pallbearers and escorted my mom’s casket out of the church and into the waiting vehicle. Since there was some time before the cemetery, the church provided a nice reception. I felt very encouraged and supported by the people who joined us, including long time friends, new friends, neighbors, church friends, and even caregivers. My brother created a slide show of my mom with friends and family – some from when she was a child and some from very recent. In the background was music performed by my mother on the piano and organ, duets with her friend, and even some of her singing. I had forgotten just how good she was when she was in her prime. We talked with and thanked all the people who were there before heading over to the cemetery. The ceremony there was short, but meaningful. The crucifix that was blessed on the casket was given to my brother. It was decided to put “Forever In Our Hearts” on the headstone. That is where she will remain, forever in my heart.

I Found God today remembering my mom’s faith and the comfort, encouragement, and loving relationships.

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The Engagement

My son met an amazing young woman 2 1/2 years ago. From the beginning she has been a blessing in our lives. Once she became a licensed massage therapist, she came over every week to give my mom a soothing hand massage. Even when my mom wasn’t up to it, she would just come over to visit. Every time my mom saw the two of them together, she would say that they looked like they were a pretty close couple. Several weeks ago, my son announced that he was going to ask his girlfriend to marry him and showed my mom the ring. Even though she was struggling with her cognition, she answered that she figured that was going to happen. When my mom took a sudden turn for the worse, my son moved up his planned proposal. The day after their official engagement, he and his new fiancee came over to tell my mom. She was not responding at that time, but they were happy they were able to tell her before she died. Today they had their first meeting at the church for marriage preparation. They are so cute and so excited. It’s a reminder that life here continues on and it can even be full of joy, hope, and love.

I Found God today in the joy of my son and his fiancee.

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Playing Her Piano

Today as I was making my way through estate paperwork, I suddenly got the urge to play the piano. I haven’t actually played in years. I sat down at the piano in front of my mom’s music books. On top was the collection of sacred music. I opened it to Amazing Grace, which was one that my mom was playing until only a few days before she died. I got my hands in the proper position and my foot on the pedal and started to play. I was shocked that I made it all the way through with very little stumbling. My brother listened and my sister took a quick break from work and came upstairs. At the finale, we all shared some tears. I know my mom was present in that moment.

I Found God today playing her music on her piano.

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Remembering Their Beautiful Song

We received a beautiful card today that spoke perfectly to my mother’s life. It said:

God gives every person their own unique song. It’s one that will play their entire life long. Through the love that they give and the gifts that they share, through the memories they make and the dreams that they dare. It’s a song filled with beauty and day to day grace, that plays through until they see God face to face. A song that is heard in the heart, loud and clear. A song, if we listen, we’ll always still hear.

I Found God today in a beautiful reminder of my Mom’s song of life.

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Do Not Be Afraid

I have been thinking about what my future is going to look like. I had somewhat thought about what I may want to do after my parents died, and where I might want to be. But now it’s here and it is a big unknown. I listened to the Gospel reading and reflection for Mass this morning before getting out of bed. It was again the story of the Apostles in the boat in a storm and Jesus sleeping. I can just imagine their mindset. How can you be sleeping? Don’t you even care that we’re about to go under? Jesus’ answer is to ask them why they are so afraid. He, of course, calms the storm. The reflection was on being courageous in all circumstances. And the reflection in Jesus Calling was the same. I was grateful for the message and reminder that God has everything in control, even when I feel out of control.

I Found God today in His reminder not to be afraid.

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Life Not Death

At church today, the first reading was from the book of Wisdom. The first sentence was, “God did not make death, nor does he rejoice in the destruction of the living.” That hit my heart immediately. The Gospel reading was about a woman who was ill for many years. She touched Jesus’ cloak and was healed. Then Jesus raised a young girl from the dead. The priest who had visited my mom several times was the celebrant for the Mass. He talked about the Sacraments of healing that the church has to offer. He told a little bit of my mom’s story. It was beautiful and heartwarming.

I Found God today remembering the blessings my mom received and God’s promise of life.

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Getting Out

Today my brothers and I decided to get out of the house. It was a relatively cool day so I packed a lunch and we went to one of favorite state parks which we had not been to in a long time. We hiked a little more than we originally anticipated and my legs made me very aware of just how out of shape I was. But it was wonderful. Surprisingly there were very few people. Those we did encounter were super friendly. There were many wild flowers in bloom along the way with busy bees and butterflies enjoying them. When we got to the bottom of the canyon, I was expecting to have to cross the stream on the rocks, but a new bridge had been constructed since the last time we were there. I didn’t mind at all. I loved listening to the stream as we followed it along the bottom of the canyon. It was good for my body, mind, and soul to spend some time in nature.

I Found God today enjoying nature.